One Word Challenge: Complicated

Hey Pieces,

For the next 8 weeks I will be participating in the One Word Challenge hosted by The Golden Spoons! Each Friday you get 3 prompts to choose from, and each Wednesday you link up with other participants.

I chose the word complicated, here is my post:

Originally, I spent a day writing this post about how I thought the inner workings of my relationship were to complicated, but in deleting that out of fear that someone would read it, I deleted it. And that has birthed a new take on complication.

This blog is a little complicated. It used to be my recovery place, where I talked about how I was getting better, what steps I took every day to feel alright, a diary of sorts. Now that this blog is a little more successful, it has specific guidelines for posts. Lines I have set to keep myself in certain categories. I feel like I have restricted myself from talking about my sad things, or my concerns, because it doesn’t fit in. I worry that my readers won’t want to read my never-ending sentences of panic. I have to keep it too myself. Which is fine. I have recently started keeping a journal again. Just a commonplace book where I put everything. I write my feelings and my memories, but its not secure. I keep it with me or on a table when I sleep, if someone wanted to read it they completely could! So I hesitate from writing bad things in there! Which is probably good, because who wants to read the bad things?

I guess what I am trying to say is that I am having a complicated time finding a place to put my sad things, or my bad days. I am still moving forward, and yes there are days that I can not be touched, I can not be myself, that just comes with the territory, but in order to get past it, I need to record it to get it out of my head. So I have numerous files titled “don’t read this”, or “delete this tomorrow”. I have videos of myself talking myself into tears because I couldn’t write it all down.” and for the past while its been working, but I still have the urge to write it here. TheseLittlePieces, originally meant all the little pieces that I had to pick up and put back together. But now it just means all the pieces of me and my life.

I’m honestly so glad that I am doing this challenge, and that I picked this word. Because I have been trying to figure out what exactly has been going on with my blog and my mind, and writing this post, and the one I deleted before it, really just helped me understand myself better.

My apologies for run on sentences or negativity, just know that even the happiest of faces can hide the sadness.

Love you all!
For all the new viewers coming from the challenge, I strongly encourage you to not back out and run away, I post a lot more enthralling content I PROMISE!

Stay beautiful everyone,
Leave a comment below with something that gives you complicated feelings!

– Mazie


7 thoughts on “One Word Challenge: Complicated

  1. I think this is an important post. It is far too easy to show a perfect face on your blog. You get to edit everything you think and feel and do and present this fabulous picture, but it isn’t honest. I think that people love you when you are real and I would welcome an opportunity to read about your insecurities, your troubles, your less than perfect days. Maybe that’s just me, but I doubt it.

  2. Blogging can be complicated and I, too, have re-evaluated what I write about as my blog has grown. I have three daughters and, as they get older, I am more conscious of their privacy too which restricts wheat I can say about them on my blog – which is tough since I’m a mommy blogger! I think it’s ok to post the sad/bad stuff bequest hat’s part of who you are as long as it’s balanced with happy stuff, too. So glad you are participating in the challenge and happy to “meet” you!

    • Dear Lisa I totally agree with you. There has to be a balance on here. You can word something the wrong way meaning something a totally different way but once it is on here the damage is done.. When we are angry we may say things in a way that really isn’t what we mean…we are just mad and/or confused at the time. In writing something that is very personal about a partner or child we can hurt them to the core and we can’t erase it on here. I have 3 daughters each one uniquely different. They think differently, act differently and explain themselves in different ways. Over the years I have seen them come back to me and say I am sorry I understand now and I didn’t mean it that way but at least it is only me they have to come to because I did not tell the world. There are things that are too personal to put out to the public but you can still talk about how you are feeling that day and get the support you need from everyone so I just wanted to thank you for your answer to Mazie as it was a good honest and reasonable solution for her and something for us all to keep in mind when we are blogging….the feelings of others…

  3. Dear Mazie..I completely understand what you are saying. You are afraid that something you write may be misunderstood or taken the wrong way…I get that. As far as your journal goes you should be able to write whatever you want in it with total privacy and that should be respected. We all have good and bad days and sometimes writing it down helps us to solve the problems we run into in life. We being human do all think differently and sometimes a 10 people can read the same sentence and take it a different way so yes I agree that on here you do have to just how much of your private life you want to reveal as you are the one living in it not anyone on here so it is you that it will affect but you are entitled to find a way to express your feelings and cry if you want to in order to get things straight in your mind. It is ok to share happy moments and even sad moments as we all have them. Anything you put in your journal are your own private thoughts and tears and anyone that disrespects that and reads it deserves to get a shock if it is about them…they shouldn’t have been so nosy however if you go to a craft store you can buy a lock to put on your journal if need be. As a young woman I needed to be able to express my feelings in writings or I think I would have gone mad. I remember at one point going back and reading it and having a great laugh that I wanted to run away and be a nun…afraid that would not have been for me but at the time I was emotional obviously lol and thought it would be a good solution. Thank god I didn’t and have 3 beautiful girls now. So yes express yourself on here but monitor it good or bad as it doesn’t mean you aren’t being truthful it only means there are certain things in your life that you prefer to keep private or within your personal circle….that is alright and doesn’t hurt this blog at all. Good luck Mazie and continue to be you because that is who we love xoxox

  4. sorry for the grammatical errors… should have checked it lol… but I think you get the idea of what I am saying xoxox

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